


We've Got the Timing (Right Down to a Science)

by heartfullofyeo (scenarios), kwlosko



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, M/M, Sad Soft Boys, This is fluff, also @ yeosang, bc it's them figuring it out kinda, tagging is hard im sorry, wooyoung deserves all the love and kisses and hugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-28
Updated: 2019-07-28
Packaged: 2020-07-23 11:53:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20007871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scenarios/pseuds/heartfullofyeo, https://archiveofourown.org/users/kwlosko/pseuds/kwlosko
Summary: It worries Wooyoung when he starts realizing how much distance Yeosang starts to put between them. It feels like an uphills battle he won't win no matter how much Wooyoung runs and chases after him. He's afraid that, maybe, Yeosang doesn't—maybe even never—has loved him in the same way he does. Which is with his full heart and soul andeverythingelse Wooyoung is.





	We've Got the Timing (Right Down to a Science)

**Author's Note:**

> this started as a fun little dm thing kaden and I did and it kind of , exploded. lol

It starts gradually.

At first, Wooyoung tries to ignore it. He tries to not think too much into it, but he finds himself overanalyzing things. The more he clings onto Yeosang, the more he distances himself from him. He doesn’t shake Wooyoung off, but he doesn’t reciprocate the kind of warmth Wooyoung feeds into him and it  _ hurts _ .

It’s after an especially tiring day when he wakes up and he’s a little more muddled-minded than usual. He powers through it because he must. There is no time for weakness in an industry as cut-throat as theirs and Wooyoung refuses to be the weak link. He refuses to be the one that will cause them all to crumble. Refuses to be the one who gives all because of a problem.

One tiny, measly problem that plagues his dreams and drips his nights in slow-dripping venom.

A problem so minute that if Wooyoung cared less, then it wouldn’t be one.

He’s in love with his best friend, Kang Yeosang.

The realization sinks slowly to the pit of his stomach. It’s a slow sinking feeling that feels like tar; grueling and oily and fiery. It sits there and makes its presence known whenever Wooyoung and Yeosang are anywhere close together in proximity. He hates it. He hates the burning touch that lingers whenever Yeosang touches him. He hates how the world around him falls away around him whenever Yeosang enters the room. Wooyoung hates how he can’t focus on anything other than how soft Yeosang’s lip would feel on his and the kind of wonder that will enter his eyes whenever he’s done something he loves.

Not that Wooyoung thinks Yeosang loves him the way Wooyoung  _ craves _ . If Yeosang reciprocated even the  _ tiniest _ amount of love back to him then Wooyoung would think he’s gone insane. Because Wooyoung? That’s crazy.

Right?

It’s a particular day when Wooyoung just feels so  _ over _ it. His heart and stupid feelings are caught in his throat when he spots Yeosang laughing without a care in the world with the rest of the members. He swallows them down and continues on. It’s just another day.

But it gets worst. It’s like the world is mocking him for his cowardice and his inability to  _ not  _ catch feelings for his dearest, best friend. Everywhere he goes, it’s Yeosang initiating contact with the others like hanging off Yunho’s arm or clinging onto San by the waist and it hurts. Because, somehow, for a reason unknown to Wooyoung, Yeosang has stopped doing all of  _ that  _ with Wooyoung. The fear of Yeosang somehow discovering Wooyoung’s silly crush on him is overwhelming and bears its weight down on his mind.

Wooyoung holes himself up in his room, hiding under covers while Yeosang is out in the living room talking to everyone else. Hours pass and he's sure, so sure that he doesn't care anymore and there are tears in his eyes again and he furiously wipes them away, mad that the tears won’t stop rolling because he hates crying. He shouldn’t be crying about something like this.

By the time Yeosang does walk in, his eyes are dry, and his gaze is bleary and blank, aimed unfocused at the wall.

Yeosang closes the door behind himself quietly, walks over... and gets right up into bed with him. "Hey, are you okay? I haven't seen you all day..."

Wooyoung shifts to the side, opting to face the wall just so he doesn't have to see Yeosang. Yeah, maybe it's childish and maybe they could handle things in more Adult ways, but he doesn't want that. Wooyoung doesn't _want_ to talk about their feelings or about how hurt he's felt from being brushed off so casually each time he tries to talk to Yeosang or how he feels like his head will explode from all the mindless thinking he's been doing these days while Yeosang's been blissfully unaware. 

(At the same time Wooyoung is wrong because he doesn't see the lingering stares Yeosang presses into him when he walks away. He definitely doesn't see all the nudges the others give Yeosang when they realize he and Wooyoung are in the midst of this cold war privy only to the both of them and no one else.)

Yeosang's tiny smile drops instantly, concern filling his expression - not that Wooyoung can see it, with his back turned to him. "He- Hey..." He reaches out, touches his shoulder. "Wooyoung-ah... What's wrong?" More silence. "Did I do something?"

Yeosang becoming increasingly more and more worried as Wooyoung doesn’t answer, instead he continues to ignore him. Yeosang cuddles Wooyoung from the back, wrapping his arms around him and kisses his neck gently, telling him that he'll be right next to him, patiently waiting for Wooyoung to give an answer when he’s ready.

Wooyoung tearing up again, jerking to wipe at his eyes again. It's rough and it stings, but he dare not let Yeosang see them. It takes several long, drawn out moments of Yeosang holding him, pressed against his back, before he finally whispers, "Why are you doing this?" His voice comes out hoarse.

Yeosang patting him on the tummy, rubbing his back until Wooyoung turns around in his hold and stare at Yeosang, eyes red rimmed, face splotchy and absolutely ugly but in Yeosang's opinion, Woo's beautiful in whatever shape or form he’s in.

Yeosang doesn’t stop touching him. He holds him gently, reaches up to wipe away the pair of tears that have fallen again. He wants to curl himself around him. To protect him. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

Wooyoung wants to laugh. It sounds ridiculous— _this_ situation is ridiculous. Instead, he shakes his head no before nuzzling his face in Yeosang's neck. He hates how he seeks comfort from him like this. There’s a moment of silence where it's just the two of them existing as Yeosang holds Wooyoung closer to him, feeling a wet patch form from where Wooyoung digs his face in but that's okay. Yeosang would give Wooyoung all the time in the world if he could.

"It's okay." Yeosang's voice is soft and sweet, soothing. He shifts his hand up to run his fingers through Wooyoung's hair. "You're okay." It's a promise. Wooyoung sniffles, curls his hands tight into Yeosang's shirt.

"I hate you," he finally mumbles after several long, long moments, his voice cracking slightly.

his fingers clench and unclench at the fabric of Yeosang's shirt as he keeps repeating the phrase. Wooyoung doesn’t know what to do. There’s a build-up of emotions inside of him threatening to burst out and the only outlet would result in more tears. he's sick of crying.

Wooyoung coughs, voice hoarse and nose congested. "Do you still even love me?"

Yeosang doesn't know why he's saying it, but Wooyoung likes to complain and be dramatic, and so as concerned as he is, he doesn't say anything. Until he asks him that, choked and hurt.

"Love you?" he echoes just as quiet and just as scared as Wooyoung had. They’re in no position in questioning each other after  _ months _ of back and forths and uncertainty on where they both stand in each other’s lives. "Of course I love you. Wooyoung, what are you talking about?"

Wooyoung, shaking his head frantically as his tears finally roll out like waves once again. "No, you don't. You don't love me anymore. Do-don't lie to me," he hiccups out. To his horror, the tears start up once again and he’s  _ tired _ of crying. Tired of being hapless when he knows he is so much more than just … this.

Digging the heels of his palm into his eyes, he sits up, untangling himself from Yeosang. Wooyoung is suffocating in his firm hold and loveless half-lies. Maybe Yeosang does love him, but it's no longer in the way Wooyoung wants him to.

"N-" And then Wooyoung's gone, curling in on himself, and Yeosang's scrambling to sit up so he can follow him. "Wooyoung. Hey..." He reaches up and his fingers twitch, aching to brush those tears away again. But he stops them midway. Wooyoung is hurt, Wooyoung is hurt because of _him_ , and he thinks that more contact might just hurt more. "W... What are you talking about? Why do you think I don't love you?"

Wooyoung doesn’t answer but that doesn’t deter Yeosang from sitting to him as close as he can without touching him.

"You just," he starts but his voice fades away half-way. Pulling his knees up, Wooyoung curls into himself by hugging them to his chest.

"Am I too clingy? Too needy?" He asks and Yeosang's heart aches because he's the cause of _this_. The cause of Wooyoung doubting himself. He doesn’t know when Wooyoung stopped confiding his worries and his secrets to him and Yeosang blames himself for not realizing it.

He's sorry, but he doesn’t know if it'll be enough.

"No." It's gentle, a promise, and Yeosang is willing his voice to stay steady and sincere all at once. "No, you're not- Why would you think that?"

Wooyoung looks away and Yeosang's heart twists violently. "You don't- I'm not-" His voice catches and he coughs to clear it. "... Just stop lying to me, okay? Just admit it."

Yeosang won’t let this go. Maybe before he would have because he didn’t want to seem too pushy. He didn’t want Wooyoung to feel like he  _ has _ to answer him.

"No, listen, Wooyoung. I  _ love _ you. I love you so much. I don't care if you think I'm lying because I know I'm telling the truth," Yeosang shifts just the tiniest of bits but it's enough to finally, finally, make contact with Wooyoung.

"I love you so much it hurts. Because every time you make my heart so full every time I see you."

Wooyoung tries to pull away, stops when Yeosang says it again, swears so vehemently that he loves him.

He.

He doesn't know what to think about that. How to respond. Just that everything hurts more, somehow. And that he wants to press in closer. "S..." He swallows harshly. "Stop... lying..." It's quiet, weaker. His shoulders slump slightly and curls his fingers harshly to stop himself from pressing into Yeosang's hands.

His shoulders shake, his chest stuttering, struggling for breath. Wooyoung leans away further from Yeosang. He's caught between wanting to maintain contact and wanting to  _ touch _ Yeosang.

"Wooyoung..." A simple name, two syllables, and Wooyoung cracks, buckling forward with a sob and letting Yeosang wrap his arms around him, pull him in close. Wooyoung presses in ever closer, tangling his fingers tight in his shirt, sniffling.

"You're the best love I'll ever have, Wooyoung," Yeosang pulls him in closer to his chest. A hand massaging the back of Wooyoung's head and the other rubbing at his back.

"I love you like how the flowers bloom in the Spring and like how the sun meets the horizon. Our love is something like inevitable, and I'm not gonna let go of that. I won't let a love like ours go."

Wooyoung whimpers, his fingers digging into Yeosang's back. He mumbles something into his shirt. Yeosang gives him all the time Wooyoung needs.

"I-I love you," it's whispered like a confession. Like it's something hidden in the dredges of his thoughts and like it's something that shouldn't be said out loud. Wooyoung looks up and Yeosang's breath is taken away.

It sinks in slowly, how he means it, what he's trying to convey, and yet Yeosang feels it somehow hit him all at once, strike him like lightning. He wants to kiss him. Wants to promise him that he's there for him, that he loves him just like that, that he wants to hold him close for forever. He wraps himself around him instead, full-bodied, cradling him as well as he can without dragging him into his lap. "I love you." This time it's softer, simpler, more heartfelt, and he feels Wooyoung's nails twist and dig into his skin. He doesn't mind.

Wooyoung continues to stare at Yeosang. He's wide-eyed and his face is tear-stained but at this moment, Yeosang knew, that this is who he can see himself with for forever.

Time slows down. All outside noises and movement seems to freeze and it's only them in the stillness of their room. It feels right when Yeosang lowers his head down. It feels right when their lips meet half-way with Wooyoung closing his shining eyes with unshed tears. It feels right when they finally kiss and all the puzzle pieces fit together and their hearts connect, chest-to-chest, lip-to-lips.

They fit together so perfectly that Yeosang doesn’t know how they came to this.

Five years of tension and hurt and feeling each other out and now Yeosang is pulling Wooyoung into his lap. It makes him taller than him, makes Yeosang tilt his head up to kiss him, one arm tight around his waist and one hand coming up to gently brush those tears away. Wooyoung scrambles and repositions, his arms wrapped around Yeosang's neck, his breath short against his lips.

Breathing heavily, they pull away from each other. Wooyoung stares down at Yeosang, thoughts running a million miles per second as he admires him. Love, he thinks, is a magical thing. How easy it is to be sated with just a few pretty words and soft kisses... there's a war in his mind but he fights against it because he wants to believe in his sincerity.

Yeosang shifts and nudges up, bumps his nose against Wooyoung's before pulling away with soft eyes and a softer sigh. "I wanna know what's wrong." He tightens his grip slightly, doesn't let him pull away again. "Did I do something? ... I want you to know I love you."

"I just..." Wooyoung sighs. The overwhelming urge to cry is no longer there, so that's a plus, but he's stuck. The words he wants to say are lodged in his throat. He feels as if he only has two options: swallow them painfully down whole or let them, along with his heart, spill out.

The fingers on Wooyoung's cheek run up into his hair, caressing sweetly. "It's okay." A gentle squeeze. "Take your time. ... You don't have to tell me, though. If you don't want to. I don't want you to be uncomfortable..."

"No, I-" Wooyoung squirms in place. "I love you too, Yeosang," he whispers with his head resting on his shoulders.

"I love you so much it feels like it's enclosing in on me sometimes. I just—I want to be around you all the damn time and it feels like you hate me for it. For being around you all of the time." Wooyoung finally tells Yeosang and his heart aches just a bit.

"I don't hate you." It's breathless, a tense promise, putting everything he can into making Wooyoung believe him. "I could never- Wooyoung, I love being around you." Another soft squeeze. "I like it when you get all clingy. It's... It's cute. Even if I'm not really good at returning it, you know?"

"I like it when your full attention is on me and me only," Yeosang face flushes as he admits it. "I like it when you shower me with kisses and hugs and I—I didn’t mean for it to seem like I hate it. Because I don’t. I really really don’t."

Wooyoung's quiet for a moment, shifting to pull back, just enough to look at him. "Then why do you keep pulling away? You always push at me or make jokes or ignore me and... and it _hurts_."

Yeosang feels his heart twist, his brows knitting up in concern as he forces himself to look Wooyoung in the eye no matter how hard his heart pounds for it. "I... I guess I never noticed? No, wait, that sounds weird. I didn't mean to be pushing you away. I guess... I dunno, I guess that's just... not... me? I mean, cuddling back? This still sounds bad wait, no..."

Yeosang lets out a frustrated sound as he stutters out unable to find the correct words to convey himself. "You just... I just. Get nervous around you. Because I can’t keep my focus off you."

Wooyoung is astonished. Disbelief colors his face as if he can’t believe he has that kind of effect on Yeosang.

"Sometimes I think about how you deserve someone who's the opposite of me. Someone brighter and full of color to match you. Not... someone like me," and to his horror, Yeosang can feel his own tears start to well up too.

Yeosang forces out a shaky laugh, takes his fingers out of Wooyoung's hair and uses his hand to rub harshly at his own eyes, hating the horrible sinking feeling in his chest. That he's right. Or that Wooyoung will think he's an idiot for saying that in the first place. There's really no way to win this, is there? Except that Wooyoung hands are coming up, too, batting his own away so he can cup his cheeks.

"No, Yeosang, no, you—you’re full of so much life. Maybe you don't think so but I know so. I—it’s the way your eyes shine full of wonder whenever we have chicken or have a day off or whenever we go out to admire the stars." Wooyoung speaks in a rush, the words nearly blending in together from how quick he talks. He doesn't want Yeosang to think it's  _ his _ fault. It's his own shortcomings that's caused them to end up here in the first place.

Wooyoung's hand smoosh at his cheeks without meaning to, making Yeosang's lips purse and making him fumble to be able to speak. "But I-"

Wooyoung realizes what he’s doing, slackens his grip. This time, when Yeosang laughs, it's still weak, but it's more genuine. Even if there are still tears in his eyes. "It's not enough for you, though, right? ... I don’t deserve you."

"You're enough for me," Wooyoung takes him by the cheeks and this time, he squishes them together intentionally. "You're enough for me and that's all that matters. I don't need anyone else; you know me like the back of your hand."

Wooyoung wipes away the stray tears that manage to roll down Yeosang's cheeks. "You deserve to know that you'll always be enough." He smiles at him. It's small still, and a little shaky on the corners but god, it's so beautiful. His favorite kind of Yeosang is a smiling Yeosang.

Yeosang sniffles slightly, goes to speak and finds himself laughing when the words come out messy and mumbled because of Wooyoung's hands. He reaches up, pulls them away gently, interlocks their fingers instead. "You're sappy." The words catch in his throat, rough and raw, but there's a sad, wistful little smile on his lips. "Are you saying you like me back?"

Wooyoung smiles but it's full of his insecurities and desperation. "So what if I am? What if I am saying I like you a whole lot, Yeosang." It's delicate. He's baring his heart fully to him now and it frightens him, but maybe, Wooyoung thinks, it's the exact same for Yeosang.

Yeosang's lips are bitten raw from more than the brief kisses they had and the bags under his eyes are so much more prominent than Wooyoung remembered them to be. Wanting to reassure Yeosang, he pulls closer, his arms a lot more decisive now.

"I really, really like you, Yeosang."

Yeosang holds him, close and tight, curling his fingers into the back of his shirt. "I... really like you, too," he murmurs like those words didn't drill into his chest, make him feel like he's cracking in half. It hurts, but... he doesn't mind it. Not when it's because of Wooyoung. It's just still hard to convince himself that this is happening.

He sniffles again, even though it makes his breath hitch and his throat tight, wet eyes falling to Wooyoung's reddened lips. They're bitten raw, too, and Yeosang hates to think that that's his fault. "Can I kiss you again?"

They kiss again. This time their lips slotting together like perfect puzzle pieces always destined for each other. It's wet with tears, now that they're both utterly consumed by each other. It hurts so much to hold Yeosang within his arms but it's a good kind of hurt.

The kind that tells you it's here to fix something. His chest feels like it's caving in on itself slowly but god, he can't let go. The hollowness in his chest gorges itself on their delicate innocence.

The kisses are slow, delicate. Yeosang's scared, as he feels his way around him, through him. He... never wants to pull away. He wants to keep him like this, close and warm, make him feel how much he cares about him. He wants to have the time to convince himself that his feelings are returned. He's careful, breathing between kisses, trying to figure out which angles affect him the most.

He wants to stitch these feelings into the veins that pump his blood to and fro. He wants to sew every last bit of feelings into the folds of his brain and his memories. Time may be finite outside but in here, where there's nothing but the sounds of their shallow breaths and lips smacking against each other, it's infinite.

Yeosang's teeth catch on Wooyoung's lip and Wooyoung whines, pressing in closer. Yeosang smiles at that, shoves all of his emotions together, uses them to nip at him properly, listen to the sweet little noises that Wooyoung makes in response.

"You're so... pretty," Yeosang murmurs against his lips, like he doesn't still feel his heart thrumming violently, overwhelmed.

Wooyoung makes a noise of protest. All the blood rushing and pumping through his veins makes him light-headed and dizzy. The words that are pushed against his lips don't register in his brain until they're just resting against each other, breathing in the emotions.

"You think I'm pretty?" Disbelief makes Wooyoung open his eyes wide because he isn’t. He can’t be compared to Yeosang's beauty.

Yeosang laughs at that, breathless and soft. "Of course I do..." He pulls back to look him in the eyes, even if yeah, that makes his heart beat faster, too. "Or- Well, no, I don't think it. You're just pretty." He bumps his nose with the tip of his own, presses the tiniest kiss to his lips.

"My pretty Wooyoung. From your eyes," he places a fleeting kiss there, "to your cute cheeks to your adorable lip mole to the tip of your nose." Yeosang leaves a small kiss with each mentioned place before finally, pressing his lips against his forehead.

"You're more than pretty to me, Wooyoung. It's why I can’t keep my eyes off of you. You just being you attracts me."

Wooyoung blinks too many times, feels his cheeks flush a dark pink. And then smacks at Yeosang's shoulder with the heel of his hand. "St- Stop being so cheesy!" he complains like they weren't just in tears, and like he wasn't just doing the same thing.

Yeosang pulls Wooyoung closer with the hand he smacked Yeosang with, and falls. They land with an 'oomph,' as Wooyoung shifts up onto his hands.

"You bring out the cheese in me," Yeosang says.

Yeosang can't stop himself from laughing, just a tiny, soft sound, as he looks up at Wooyoung.

Wooyoung pouts at that, screwing up his nose before allowing himself to fall forward thumping down onto him unceremoniously. "Good."

Wooyoung lays his head on Yeosang's chest. Listening to the beat of his heart, his right hand seeks out Yeosang's and he intertwines his fingers when he finds it. His steady heartbeat lulls his worries and Wooyoung wants them to stay like this for forever.

"Will you be my boyfriend?" Wooyoung whispers out into the cold air. Maybe it's a mistake, or maybe it isn't, but Wooyoung knows this much: he loves Yeosang. He has since the day they met and always will.

Yeosang feels his heartbeat pick up at that, his cheeks flushing. "You want to? I... You want  _ me _ to?" He holds him tighter, squeezes his hand gently. Hesitates, before kissing the top of his head. "Yeah. Yeah, I'd like that a lot."

"But," he says as his face burrows itself in Wooyoung's hair. He smells faintly like fresh linen and vanilla. "You have to,  _ have to _ , tell me whenever you feel like this again, okay?" When Wooyoung doesn’t move to make an answer or anything, Yeosang shifts his head until they make eye contact again. "Okay?"

Wooyoung tries to turn in his grasp but his iron-clad hold on him won’t allow it. He’s stuck staring at Yeosang and honestly, as reluctant as he is to agree, to lower his shields and be agreeable, there’s this warm feeling originating somewhere near the bottom of his heart that makes him so, so grateful.

There’s a war between his mind and his emotions. They’re always in conflict with each other and he wants to give in; wants to believe the pretty words that fall out of Yeosang’s beautiful mouth. Maybe he does think too much and not  _ feel _ enough. But sometimes, you have to take that leap of faith, and Wooyoung is tired of constantly dangling his feet over the edge and fooling his own self that there will be nothing but an abyss of emptiness to consume him.

These warm arms that circle around his waist prove to him that there is more to it than that. That while it may still be a gorge, there will still be water at the bottom to catch him from plummeting.

“Okay,” his admission is quiet. Slight. The words hardly sinking in. It’s buoyant, wanting to float up into the air and disappear into nothingness because of how much Wooyoung  _ doesn’t  _ believe in them.

But Yeosang takes his chin into one hand, grounding him, and looks,  _ really _ looks, into his eyes, searching for even the barest of thread of belief. “Wooyoung,” he says. His eyes softening when Wooyoung finally— _ finally— _ meets his piercing gaze. “Do you trust me?”

Wooyoung doesn’t need to think twice before answering with an “of course”. The words are spoken with so much sincerity it could be heavy but that’s what Yeosang looks for. He’s looking for emotions.

Yeosang nods. He trusts Wooyoung too. “Me too,” and he must know, above all else, that he is the first Yeosang will always go to. They’re two ends of the same, unwinding string. Lost but still connected.

“You’re always going to be my first choice,” Yeosang mumbles, words tumbling out and laying themselves bare. “It will always be you.” Quiet confessions whispered into the night is a comfort. There’s nothing but the silence and the moon bearing witness to them. There is no judgement here unlike prying eyes that awaken and focus on their every move in the light where things are just that much fickler.

“It’s always been you, Yeosang,” whispering it out, Wooyoung realizes that that leap of faith isn’t as scary as he has always seen it to be.

It isn’t as scary with someone free-falling right beside him too.

**Author's Note:**

> it kind of spiraled out of control bc im _just_ a little on the angstier side of things and without kaden to guide me. well. heh >:)
> 
> connect with us on twt! [@just_Clouds](https://twitter.com/just_Clouds) & [@dalbich_sonata](https://twitter.com/dalbich_sonata) ♥♥♥


End file.
